If you were transported from this world to another almost identical. If you were transported from your life to your teenage self. If you had to restart your life again. Would you, or would you cling to your memories?
Wednesday, 24 August 2016
Not dropped
In case anyone wonders. No, I haven't dropped the story. I'm just taking the time between book four and book five to clean up the second half of book three.
Monday, 15 August 2016
Epilogue, 2017
With gunshots
still ringing in his ears the man stared at his phone in disbelief.
Fuck fuck fuck
fuck! And after we've done so well. He opened up his com
unit. “We're out of here. Split to the cars as planned!”
Two hours earlier
they received the go ahead they needed, and now five men lay dead in
different parts of Tokyo. The sixth managed to get halfway to Sendai
before they found him and killed him in his hotel room.
He ran down the
stairs and jumped into the waiting car. Police would arrive soon.
Five minutes too late thanks to the green lieutenant colonel who
abused every contact she had to have her former colleagues finish
their meals or whatever they did with smiles on their faces. All
knew, and none of them pretended knowing. Today would mean a sudden
surge in unsolved homicide cases.
Then there was
that message on his phone. A car accident. A car accident combined
with a prepared transfer order for the headship of Himekaizen Academy
meant that it was no accident at all.
Fuck fuck fuck
fuck!
The other faction
won in the end. A pyrrhic victory, but a victory still. In a burning
car wreck the new principal had been found dead just minutes earlier. Another candidate would receive his career step soon.
How the
fucking hell did he manage to get that position?
Starting tomorrow
the new principal of Himekaizen Academy would be Kareyoshi Takeshi.
Wednesday, 10 August 2016
Chapter six (segment ten), 2017, spring break
Just outside
Hiroshima Ulf heard a voice calling his name. His real name, not the
Japanese pronunciation of it.
What the hell?
He stood by his
bike outside a convenience store, and there just wasn't any way he
could pretend he hadn't heard.
How did they
find me? Oh well, I guess it was bound to happen.
“Who's asking,”
he said.
“I am,” a man
in his forties answered in Swedish.
An arrival?
Bloody hell, it's Christina's grandpa!
“You took ages
to track down, but just vanishing off the net won't stop someone like
me. I'm too old for that crap anyway.”
He would be.
Ninety a hundred? Well, something like that. “What do you want,
Mitsuo?” Ulf said, likewise in Swedish.
“They're
looking for you, your friends you know.”
Ulf nodded. He
knew. “What about it?” He couldn't depend on their friendship
just yet, so he tried to sound as callous as possible.
“I heard you
hurt my Tina.”
So he's
here on a revenge trip. “She hurt herself. I helped,”
Ulf admitted. Thinking of her ripped a hole in his heart.
“I heard she
hurt you,” Mitsuo said.
OK, so not a
revenge trip after all. “We weren't too smart, I guess,” Ulf
said. “Too late now.”
Mitsuo shrugged.
“I disagree. When they're dead, or you've transited, then it's too
late, and sometimes not even then.”
Ulf suspected
Mitsuo thought of how he met Christina in this world. “That's not
why you had me tracked down, is it Mitsuo?”
Mitsuo smirked.
“No,” he agreed. “It's not. I think you're both idiots, but I'm
no matchmaker. I need to speak with you about killing.”
“I already made
it clear that murders are unacceptable.”
“Does that
include those directly involved in the attack on your friends?”
Ulf took a deep
breath. For a moment he hesitated. Those directly involved. That
would include the one who shot Amaya's friend. For a short time he
fought a battle in his mind. His Swedish pacifist upbringing versus
what had happened.
“Ulf, I need an
answer.”
“Wait!” The
morally right thing to do, or the right thing to do? “Kill them!”
he said to his own surprise, and for the first time since the
kidnapping attempt he remembered the sound of gunshots in the car he
rode. How his daughter received the wounds she eventually died from.
“Kill them all!”
“Whoa! Now you
wait a moment. What do you mean by all?”
“Only those
directly involved. Take them out. No torture, not talking, no
nothing. Just kill them!”
“And those
responsible?”
Ulf smiled, and
then he felt his smile widen into a grin. For a moment Mitsuo
flinched before he regained his composure.
“Sano-sensei,”
Ulf said, for the first time using the polite way of addressing his
senior, “I don't want them to die. That's too easy. I want them to
live long and horrible lives.”
Mitsuo took a
step back. “I can see why Tina fell for you. I hope you were good
to her, because she never was to herself.”
“You'll have to
ask her,” Ulf said. He heard how harsh that sounded, but talking
about her hurt. “I can't presume to know, but I tried. If I was
enough I don't know.”
“But you think
you tried your best? That will suffice for me.” Then a calculating
grin spread over Mitsuo's face. “Who's the most important for you,
you or Tina?”
“I am.” Ulf's
answer came immediately. His daughter's death taught him the hard way
that the people depending on him would fall if he didn't take care of
himself. If he didn't, who would?
“And?”
“I'd die for
her.” That answer also came immediately. When the loss was absolute
he'd step aside. Besides, a world without Christina, even if she was
no longer his girlfriend, was no world worth living in. It would be,
some day, Ulf knew that, but not today.
“So you really
are a being of two worlds,” Mitsuo said. “Like my daughter.”
Ulf knew what he
meant. Not this world and the other one, but Sweden and Japan. He was
Swedish through and through, but sometimes he looked upon life in
ways that was different from those around him.
That had been
harder when he was a child, but as he grew up more and more people
around him shared the sense of standing with a foot each in a
different world. The new generation of Swedes.
In the end Ulf
just nodded consent. Mitsuo knew, but he could never truly
understand. He had moved from one world to another, not stayed his
life in one, always listening to a shadow of the unknown.
“Did you get
the answers you came for?” Ulf asked. He wanted to end the
conversation and continue his hike.
“I did.” A
darkness fell over Mitsuo's face. “Don't take too long. They need
you. My Tina needs you.”
What?
“Why, what do you mean?”
“She's dying
inside. I met her. Even if you two can't be a couple, she still needs
you close to her. Please, if not for yourself, then for my little
Tina!”
Ulf dropped the
food he had just bought into his bags. He didn't need to hear that
Christina was hurting. “I can't promise anything. When I'm ready
I'll return.”
“If that's the
best you can do then I'll have to settle for that.” First Mitsuo
made as if to leave, but then he stopped. “May I tell your
friends?”
Ulf had known
that question would come up. “I'm sorry, but you can't. I need this
time. This is my spring break.”
“Ends
tomorrow.”
“I know, let's
just call it an extended spring break.”
Mitsuo bowed. “I
acknowledge you,” he said and left the parking place.
Ulf stood left
behind. The meeting with Christina's grandfather had signalled an end
to something, and a new beginning. Now Ulf needed to reach that
beginning before he hurt his friends even more.
Not tomorrow,
but a few days more. I'll heal. I have to heal. Christina, I love
you.
Sunday, 7 August 2016
Chapter six (segment nine), 2017, spring break
The
last Sunday of their spring break Yukio was supposed to meet Ryu, who
wanted to tell him something strange that happened.
The
last Sunday of their spring break Yukio sat together with Kyoko,
listening to a Sato-sensei livid with rage.
Two
older men he had never seen before listened to her yelling, together
with Principal Nakagawa; former Principal Nakagawa. He was retired
now.
From
time to time Principal Nakagawa spiced Sato-sensei's yelling with a
few choice curses of his own. They were both very much in agreement.
As
for Yukio, he stared at the display in bewilderment, and by his side
Kyoko sat looking scared. As scared as he was himself.
A
minute earlier her father had stormed out of the room screaming
obscenities that would have had him expelled had he been a student at
Himekaizen. Yukio agreed with all of them, every single curse
accentuated exactly what he felt.
“… don't
care what you think you fucking whore-sons! They're getting an
escort, and that's final!”
“Please
Sato-san...”
“Please
Lieutenant Colonel Sato! Shut the hell up and do as you're ordered! They gave me this rank just because I'd outrank you.”
Kyoko
covered her ears.
“Ma'am!”
Both men came to attention.
“It's
just the...” one of them tried.
“Just
the what?”
“The
arms. Why an armed escort?”
Sato-sensei
stared at the man with thunder in her eyes. “Because they were
assaulted by a gun-toting maniac, one who shot and killed a police!
Were you two born morons, or did you need some special education to
lower your intelligence that way?”
Yukio
noted how Principal Nakagawa grinned wildly at the assessment. One of
them looked at him for help.
“No
no,” he said. “I wouldn't use her language, but none of you two
fill the requirements to be accepted to Himekaizen.”
Which
was just about the same as using Sato-sensei's language.
One
of the men reddened and tried to rise, only to be dragged back down
by his colleague.
“Ma'am,
we need solid evidence first.”
“Are
you trying to tell me Kareyoshi managed to hide even one of the
tracks leading back to him? Her bloody father fucking managed to dig
him up!” Sato-sensei pointed at Kyoko who still sat with her hands
over he ears.
'Her
father' hadn't, not really. After he started making questions Yukio
made a digital excursion of his own, and with Kyoko's father watching
over his back the screen soon filled with an intricate net of
information all pointing back at their English teacher. Now Yukio
understood what Urufu meant when he said Kareyoshi needed a
dictionary to find the meaning of the word discreet, and that he'd
still fail understanding it.
“Ma'am,
is that armed escort an order?” The protests had gone out of his
voice.
“Finally!
Yes, with that murderer taking the helm I'm not risking anything.”
And
so it was decided. As soon as they could muster the men Yukio and
Kyoko would go to school and leave school with an armed bodyguard.
Yukio wasn't so certain the reason was their safety, more likely that
Sato-sensei wanted Kareyoshi to know that the other side knew about
everything he had done.
Looks
like a fun second year, Yukio thought glumly. Well, as long as he
had Kyoko he could face anything.
They
left the nondescript building that had served as Kyoko's private
hospital a couple of months earlier. The surgical facility was still
inside, somewhere. He didn't have a lot of good memories from the
place and tried his best at forgetting.
“Urufu,
heard anything?” Sato-sensei asked when she drove them home.
Yukio
shook his head. He guessed Kyoko did the same from the back seat. He
didn't have Urufu's technical skills when it came to digging up a
presence on the net. His skills lay in his understanding of dozens of
communities, and the contacts he made on them. While some of his
otaku contacts were bat shit crazy they were still very good at
sniffing out stuff online.
“Sorry,
Sato-sensei,” Yukio said in case she hadn't understood his gesture.
“He's gone, but he can take care of himself.”
She
looked at him when they stopped at a red-light. “You trust him that
much?”
“We
both do,” Kyoko said. “You know, this is the first time I've seen
him hurt. He just needs some time to think things over.”
Think
things over. Yeah, man, that's what you usually do. But it was
fine mess Urufu put himself into this time. I just hope you're right,
Kyoko.
Sato-sensei
must have seen his hesitation. “But you're still worried, aren't
you?”
“Yes,
yes we are. I wonder where he is.”
When
Sato-sensei didn't say anything, Yukio took his phone and sent Ryu a
message. Maybe they could still meet, even if it meant being a little
late.
By
the time they reached Kyoko's home Ryu still hadn't answered. He
still hadn't when Yukio unlocked his own door. That was reason enough
to call him, but now Ryu's phone was out of service, just like
Urufu's.
Well,
they'd meet tomorrow. If it wasn't important enough for Ryu to keep
his phone on, Yukio guessed whatever it was Ryu wanted to talk about
could wait another day.
Yukio
announced his arrival, but the flat was dark. His mother was probably
out shopping. With the flat for himself he drew a bath and prepared
to wait for her. At least he had someone to wait for.
Urufu, damn
it! What the hell are you doing? Where are you?
Saturday, 6 August 2016
Chapter six (segment eight), 2017, spring break
Ryu allowed Mars
to turn into April before he made his mind up. He missed Ai-chan, but
not as much as he had feared, and that made him a little disgusted
with himself. If he was this callous, then he needed someone to watch
over him, and who better suited than Kuri, with her lifelong
experience from life?
“Are you still
sure about this?” he asked her. They sat in the same café as when
she had dropped the bomb three days earlier.
“No, she said.
I'm anything but sure, but I'm running out of time.”
“So, what do we
do, and why me?”
“Look, I'll be
absolutely honest with you. I see you as a boy, am honest, decent and
good boy, but a boy still.”
Ryu nodded. He
already knew that. “So why me?” he repeated.
“Because you
have everything that would you grow up into a good and decent man.
Because your have your name, and because in my world your looks could
make the idiots I'm working with believe we're really a couple.”
He listened to
her reasons, almost a short speech.
“I'll take the
good and decent parts,” he said and grinned. “My looks are only a
tool. They don't define who I am.”
Kuri grimaced.
“They do, to a much greater degree than you can understand yet.”
She tuned that grimace into a smile, as beatifically gorgeous as
always. “People react to you because of how you look, and you can't
avoid being coloured by those reactions.”
Ryu didn't really
understand, but he had no reasons not to believe her, even if she was
biased because of her line of work. Instead he nodded pretence that
he had understood.
“Ulf could
explain better than I do. He was always better at explaining.” He
smile turned into one of longing and sadness. “He should have
explained better.”
She was miles
away. Ryu read in her eyes how she followed him in her mind wherever
he had gone with his bike. Probably shared the road with him on the
bike he had given her as a present.
Then his eyes
fell on her left hand. A ring glittered on it, a large brilliant
catching the lights in the café.
She must have
seen him looking at it. “Is it time for me to take it off?”
Huh?
“Sorry, I didn't mean...”
“Is this the
last day I wear the ring?” she interrupted. “Are you my boyfriend
or not?”
So it was finally
time to voice his decision. “Yes, provided you really are my
girlfriend.”
With a bitter
smile she put her right hand over his. “Then we're dating.” She
couldn't prevent tears from welling up in her eyes, but none dropped
as she pulled the ring off her finger. “I'll save this. It's a
memory. I'll have memories.”
I wonder what
happens next. Ryu pulled her hand over the table and cradled it
in his own. She hadn't worn the ring long enough for it to make a
mark on her finger. Memories only. Not even a lingering mark to
prove you two were together.
He had gained a
girlfriend. He had lost a friend in doing so, because he doubted
Urufu would accept the sudden turn of events. He hadn't even have
time t lose his love. Ai-chan still ached in his heart. I guess it
makes us one of a kind. Boyfriend and girlfriend still in love with
another.
At
least he considered Kuri one of his best friends. At least that, even
if they were a couple now. Something they could start from. Something
they could share.
Can
I learn to love you again? He didn't know.
“You're
silent,” Kuri said. She hadn't pulled back her hand. It still lay
in his hand, long, slender and cool to his touch. A beautiful hand,
just like the rest of her was beautiful.
“Just
thinking.”
The
smile he received carried some happiness in it. “And he already
begins. Thinking. Don't you dare to copy him!”
Huh?
Oh, yes, Urufu always try to think things through. Ryu hadn't
thought of it that way. Did Urufu over-think everything?
“Yes
he does,” Kuri said. She had this way of almost reading people's
mind. Long before it had scared him a little, but not any more.
“Should
we invite your bodyguard to our table,” Ryu said instead.
“Oh,
so you noticed?”
He
had. Ryu always knew of the people around him. “He's very
discreet,” Ryu said in an attempt to make an excuse for Kuri's
bodyguard. He really wasn't, all that discreet that was. Ryu had seen
him throw them worried glances for most of their lunch.
Kuri
waived him the their table and he took a seat.
“Wakayama
Ryu,” Ryu offered.
“Please
to meet you. I'm afraid my profession prevents me from disclosing my
name,” the man said.
“I
guess,” Ryu said. “Well, Kuri, now what?” he asked and turned
his attention to her. “Do we make some kind of grand announcement,
or do we just let it filter out through the rumour mill?
“I
got myself a tactician this time. Filter out.”
“I
need to know, are Ai-chan and Urufu taboo subjects when we speak from
now on?”
“Gods
no! Why would I do something like that to us two? You know, and I
know.”
He
nodded. “But if things change?”
“If
things… Oh, I see. Just tell me if your feelings change, will you.”
But
you won't, because your feelings won't. OK, I can live with that.
“I will,” he said. Poor Ai-chan. When she gets to know about
this. But maybe it was better this way. If she got angry enough
with him she'd move on faster. “You do the same,” he added to
remind her it wasn't very polite implying he was the only one who
could have a change of heart.
Kuri
gave him a peculiar look in return. One filled with a little
amusement. “If that happens you'll be the first to know.” A
mischievous grin followed the words.
Thursday, 4 August 2016
Chapter six (segment seven), 2017, spring break
When Ryu came
home far too early from his date with Ai-chan Noriko got worried. She
thought of cornering him, but there was something in his face that
made her stop. Instead she sent a message to Ai-chan and asked if
they girls could meet up. After that she sent one to Kyoko as well.
Only three of
us, or maybe that is three of us again. Messaging Kuri was
pointless. She worked and worked and worked.
After some delay
they decided to meet at the Haven. Ai-chan could make it in almost no
time at all, which just served to worry Noriko even more.
What happened
today?
She got into her
coat, pulled on her best boots and left the house silently so as not
to call Ryu's attention to her.
On her hands she
wore thin leather gloves, a White Day gift from Nao that taught her a
lot about his absolute eye for what suited her. They hugged her
fingers, but she'd have been a lot happier if it was Nao doing the
hugging. He spent the break working almost as hard as Kuri.
The road to the
station took its usual ten minutes, and just three stops later she
left. In theory she could have walked to the café; it was just a
little too long for comfort. Well, unless you were Urufu, but that
maniac walked or cycled just about everywhere.
Thinking of Urufu
soured her mood a little. He still hadn't been found.
From station to
haven a mere five minutes, and when she got inside James pointed her
to the table where Ai-chan sat waiting. Kyoko still hadn't made it
there.
Noriko ordered
some black tea and a sliver of a cake and walked to the table. When
she was almost there Ai-chan turned to greet her.
Gods! What
happened today?
With eyes ringed
red in a way no make-up could hide Ai-chan gave her a weak smile. “Hi
Wakayama-san.”
Always forget
you're not part of the club. Not even our school. Still call my
brother Ryu-kun? “Hello, thanks for coming on such short
notice.” Noriko took a chair and sat down.
Ai-chan sniffled
and smiled again. “Don't thank me. I could need someone to talk
with right now, and you've always been a good friend.”
“What
happened?” No point in avoiding the topic now. Ai-chan had as much
as invited her.
“I broke up
with Ryu-kun.”
Oh dear!
“Did he cheat on you?” Despite being the first words to come to
her mouth Noriko didn't believe them even as she spoke.
“No!” For the
first time Ai-chan displayed anger rather than heart break. “You
have a wonderful brother. He'd never cheat on me!”
OK, so then
why?
“I love him,
and I can feel he loves me back. He's honest and good and kind.”
Don't tell me
this is a repeat of Kuri and Urufu! “Why, then why did you
break up?” Noriko sipped some tea while she waited for Ai-chan's
answer. She must have known the question would come, but maybe an
answer didn't come easy anyway.
Biting her lower
lip, Ai-chan looked like she had problems deciding whether to tell or
not. “Dad,” she said eventually. “It's dad.”
But for the
love of all gods! What's with adults and breaking couple up? So
it was a repeat after all. “Who broke up?”
Noriko
immediately regretted that question. No sobbing, but Ai-chan's face
tore open in a silent display of desperate hurt. One tear ran all the
way down to her chin and dropped into her tea cup.
“I did. I
called him out and broke up with him.” She wiped her face with the
back of her hand. “But I still love him! Am I a bad girl?”
No, she really
wasn't. Too abrasive by far for Noriko's tastes, but despite that
still a sweet girl. “I think Ryu likes you still,” Noriko said.
There had been that look in his face when he came back home. No, he
really still did have feelings for her.
Over the door the
bell chimed, and Kyoko came inside. Noriko saw her turning her head,
searching for them both until James gave her a helping hand.
She ordered
something and walked between tables and chairs to join them. When she
came closer she made a big 'O' with her mouth. Noriko guessed she had
discovered Ai-chan's swollen face.
“Is it Ryu?
I'll kick him between his legs if he hurt you!”
And Ai-chan broke
down again. This time her sobs carried all over the café.
"I don't think my
idiot bro is at fault this time,” Noriko said silently. So much
easier if it had been his wrongdoing. “I think,” she continued
and took a bite of her cake. She barely noticed the taste. “I think
this is more of the fallout from what we did earlier.”
Kyoko nodded and
sat down. As a supporting person she was much more sensible than
Noriko, the latter noted when Kyoko buried Ai-chan's face in a bear
hug. “So, so. Just cry.”
A bit ashamed she
had lost out in humanity, Noriko took one of Ai-chan's hands in her
own. She patted it, unsure what people usually did in situations like
these. When Kuri crashed she had given her a blanket, but she spent
that afternoon listening to Kuri crying her heart out from a safe
distance. Maybe it's not just a western thing to touch your
friends when they're hurting.
Maybe she
suffered from some emotional flaw. Noriko couldn't remember breaking
down. Not really. She had hurt when Urufu rejected her and chose Kuri
instead, but breaking down? No. I always thought only weak people
did. But Urufu was one of the strongest she knew, and Yukio had told
her his friend crashed into a sobbing wreck late Valentine's night.
Maybe I'm the
one who needs changing. Noriko patted Ai-chan's hand. Clumsily,
but she kept on patting it hoping it offered at least a glimmer of
comfort.
Wednesday, 3 August 2016
Chapter six (segment six), 2017, spring break
It was a
desperate plan, but she was trapped if she didn't do anything. No way
in hell she'd let the pigs decide who had access to her body next. So
Christina found herself with a problem she couldn't solve.
Until she saw Ryu
with his girlfriend. She looked like she had cried her heart up, and
for a moment Christina boiled with anger at whatever Ryu had done to
the poor girl. Ai-chan was too lovable to hurt like that.
In the end
Christina decided to spy on the pair.
She never got
close enough to hear anything, but from what she saw they tried to
resolve some kind of crisis. She smiled when she saw their embrace,
but a spike of pain shot through her immediately after. Should
have been me and Ulf. Ulf, where are you?
Then, to her huge
surprise Ryu left Ai-chan and walked back. Christina saw the girl
staring after him with an expression of longing and abandonment in
her face. Then she broke down in tears and vanished under the bridge.
What the hell
just happened? Ryu, you bastard! I'll wring you dry. But his face
combined with his words told her another story when they sat over a
table with overpriced food. It was at that moment her plan came to
her.
“Would you like
to date me?”
The two of them
hurting for someone they still loved. It would make it all so much
easier to explain.
“What?”
Well, after he
wiped that dumbfounded grin off his face.
“I said, would
you want to be my boyfriend?”
“What the hell?
OK, I'm off.” He grabbed his jacket and left the table.
Christina calmly
collected her own and followed him. Her plan was harebrained enough
it might just work. She caught up with him just as he entered the
elevator.
“Let me
explain,” she said on the way down. “It's not what it sounds
like. Well, it is, but still not.”
He didn't try to
run away from her, so she made him company to the station. Ryu walked
a few steps ahead of her, but she could still imagine his stony face.
An honest boy. That was the part of him Christina liked most. He made
a good friend to both Yukio and Ulf.
Again, thinking
of Ulf bled a razor of pain through her. He would always hurt in her
mind.
“Ryu,” she
said as they swiped their wallets over the receptor at the turn
stile. “I'll always love Ulf.”
That had him stop
temporarily.
“Make no
mistakes about that. Ulf is the only man I could love fully.”
Ryu slowed down
enough to make her come up by his side.
“My employer
thinks I'm some kind of property they can have and sell as they wish.
Now they're trying to force a boyfriend on me.”
For the first
time since she dropped the bomb Ryu's face softened a little. “I'm
listening.”
“I refuse. If I
can show I already have a boyfriend from what the arseholes here
consider a good family I'll be off the hook.”
“So pretend
boyfriend?”
And here was the
catch. “No, boyfriend. We may not be in love with each other, but
I'll only do this for real. If it doesn't work out, or if it's too
weird, we'll break up. OK?”
She didn't want
Ryu to learn how to behave like a player. If he just pretended to be
her boyfriend he'd start having girls on the side, and even if
Christina wouldn't feel betrayed, she still didn't want him to get
used enough to that kind of life to hurt the girls who entered his
life after her.
“So you want me
to be your real boyfriend when you're still in love with Urufu and
I'm in love with Ai-chan?”
Christina nodded.
“Yes.”
Then he surprised
her. “Let me think about it.”
“Please do, but
not longer than before school starts, OK?”
Ryu nodded. “I
promise.”
She watched him
take his train. There would be another in a few minutes, and she had
to respect him enough to give him some time on his own after her
absurd suggestion.
From some
distance away her bodyguard, the one who had worked with her for over
half a year by now, came up to her. “I couldn't help but hear. Are
you sure about this?”
Since she slowly
crawled up from the hell hole that was leaving Ulf behind they had
begun talking. Not much, but some.
“No,” she
said. “I'm not. But if I can't have the man I love, at least I can
have control over my own life.”
“Yes miss. I
understand.” He had the look of a worried father on his face. Maybe
he was one for all she knew. “Please be careful,” he added.
Yeah, you
probably are. I wish you a good life. In
this life she had decided to treat those who worked with her like
people and not like human resources.
“I'm going
home. Ready for that bike of yours?”
He smiled. “I'm
ready. Just don't leave me behind.”
They took the
next train and left at the station where both bikes stood locked to a
stand. For once she kept her speed safe and sane. Ulf's birthday gift
to her. Whenever she had a chance she rode that bike.
At a red-light
she dug into her pocket and picked up her latest gift. Her ring. I
can't wear you for much longer. At least not if Ryu agrees. She
put it on her finger. Pretend wife. For a few days she'd be a pretend
wife.
Tuesday, 2 August 2016
Chapter six (segment five), 2017, spring break
A day after they
returned back to Tokyo from their coaching sessions in Nagoya, Ryu
got a call from Ai-chan. She needed to meet him, and she needed to
meet him right now.
With a lump of
discomfort in his stomach he took the train and subway to Shibuya.
Ai-chan had taken a liking to wait by the statue of Hachiko.
When he arrived
she sat behind the bronze dog. Her eyes were lined with red, as if
she had been crying and tried to mask it with make-up.
“What's up,”
Ryu asked.
“Not here,”
she answered. “Let's go somewhere where we can be alone.” For
once she didn't glare at the other girls giving him evaluating
glances.
He nodded and
took her hand. For a short moment it felt like she was about to take
hers back, but then she lodged her fingers around his. They crossed
the great intersection and made their way into the smaller streets on
the other side.
“So?” Ryu
wanted to know when the crowd had petered out into nothing.
“I'm so angry,”
she began. “Dad listened to some stupid rumours, and he said you're
bad for me.”
So it was like
that after all. “And now you want to break up?”
“No! I don't
want to at all. I like you. But I'll have to keep it a secret.”
Ryu shook his
head. “Sorry, no can do. I'm never ashamed of those I like. I won't
agree to hide that you're my girl.”
“But...”
He felt he grip
on his hand tighten. Ryu squeezed back. He really did like Ai-chan.
More than like. In a way he guessed he loved her. “Sorry,” he
said. “We're either together and face whatever problems we run
into, or we're not together at all.” He was his father's son, and
his mother's. They'd think less of him if he huddled in the shadows.
“I… I can't.
Dad scares me.”
“Look, Ai-chan,
I really like you. I won't force you to make a choice, but I'll never
hide that you're my girlfriend. I'm proud of you and honoured you
wanted me by your side instead of some other boy.”
They reached the
H&M shop Kuri referred to as her first clash with reality since
she arrived in Japan. Ryu led them down the street to avoid the
people around them. A bit further away the street dug under train
tracks, and the noise should block out any unwanted listeners.
“I'm so sorry.
I love you, but I don't dare having a fight with my dad. Let's break
up.”
Ryu bowed and
stole a last hug and kiss. “I have to respect that. I want you to
know I'm not doing this happily, but let's break up.”
Ai-chan's lips
turned down, and it looked like she was going to cry. “Just once
more!” she said and pulled him to her. She tasted of salt.
“Friends?” he
whispered into her ear when they hugged after the kiss.
“Friends,
always,” she said.
He left her
there, under the bridge. His chest hurt, and he didn't dare to turn
and look after her. If she still stood there waiting for him he
wouldn't have it in him to continue walking.
Now that's a
shitty way to spend spring break, he thought when he had come far
enough up the street to know he wouldn't be able to see the bridge
even if he turned around. For that reason he did just that. Just to
see if she had followed him. She hadn't.
He felt a pang of
regret, but even though he respected secrets, there were still a kind
of them he refused to acknowledge. He wouldn't lie about his
girlfriend.
Ryu was about to
turn back into the small maze of streets that led back to the station
when he ran into Kuri. She smirked and stared down the street he had
come from.
“I saw that,
you know,” she said.
“Saw what?”
He hadn't seen her following them.
“I saw her
waiting for you with that look in her face.”
Damn! Is it
that impossible to hide anything from you? “So?”
“Make up or
break up?”
“Let's have a
coffee,” Ryu suggested. He could as well get something out of a day
that had already gone down the drain anyway.
They found a
table at a rather expensive book café that should have overlooked
the intersection but for the lack of windows. Expensive or not, it
was well within acceptable range for his wallet. Ryu knew he had it
easy when it came to money, and even more so with Urufu's ludicrously
well paid stunts. He guessed Kuri made even more given her rising
fame.
“So,
interrogation time?” Ryu said after his coke arrived together with
what tried to be a full lunch.
Kuri started
digging in on her own food. She just nodded with her mouth full.
Ryu watched her
with some admiration. You're perfectly aware of how beautiful you
are, but sometimes you're just so sloppy. Then, as he gave her a
second look, he noticed that some of that beauty looked stale. Like
someone had made a life-sized statue that moved like Kuri. You're
still hurting. Have you given up as well?
“Well,” he
continued and tried to pretend he hadn't noticed her lifeless eyes. “What do you want to know?”
“Make up or
break up?” Kuri said again.
Ryu sighed.
“Break up.”
“Poor boy.”
When did you get
that sarcastic? “Maybe I am. Neither of us wanted to.”
With a face
turned to stone Kuri met his eyes. “Then you know where I stand.
I'm sorry for you, but it's also an opportunity.”
What the hell?
“Look, if you're going to behave like a piss ant I'm leaving.”
“Sorry, I
apologise.”
“OK.”
“I have a
problem, and a suggestion.”
Ryu had a feeling
he wouldn't like what was coming. He put down his fork on his plate.
“I'm listening.”
“The people at
Vogue are trying to pair me up with some kind of idol. I'm less than
impressed. Would you like to date me?”
Monday, 1 August 2016
Chapter six (segment four), 2017, spring break
As far as he knew
he managed to avoid anyone recognising him. The half a day biking too
close to Nagoya for his own comfort had him on the edge, but now he
had made it safely south of that city.
Ulf burned with
longing for going on-line, but that was just too risky. An old style
Internet café would have sufficed, but that meant heading into
central Nagoya, and he was certain someone would pick up on him if he
did.
Now he was less
than a day's ride from his destination, and the morning sun led him
in his wanted direction.
Last night, and
the night before that he had spent in love hotels. When the
population density increased he didn't dare sleeping in the open. Not
because it was dangerous, but because someone might call the police,
and then his adventure would be over.
Ulf rode small
roads and the occasional street. Always south, and always closer to
his goal. That village loomed bigger in his mind the closer he got.
An illusion, he knew, but an illusion that might help him understand
where he had gone wrong with his life.
Just south of the
cluttered town he turned west and started climbing the mountain
roads. The disorganised splattering of buildings gave way to, first
rice fields, and when he got further inland, to tea fields with their
rounded rows of bushes lining the slopes.
Occasionally the
road cut across a river with concrete embankments and a desolate rill
worming its way through the middle.
By now he knew
where he was. In that other world he'd come here with his parents
from time to time since he was ten. The last years he even brought
Maria and their kids.
There would be
differences, small ones, but important ones for him. In this world
his mother was never his mother, and the few things he'd helped add
to the house wouldn't exist.
His legs hurt
from too many day's of cycling. In this body he'd never done anything
like it, and it had barely begun to adapt to this kind of punishment.
It should get better within a few days, but until then he just had to
live with it. Well, and walking like a lame cow whenever he
dismounted.
Then he crossed
the last river, made a sharp turn left and rolled into the village. Here there were only rice fields embracing the river on both sides,
and old and new mixed together in a dizzying display of how the
residents had made more money from selling their fields that growing
rice on them. Two golf courses a bit upstream had taken their place
and made people rich overnight.
Ulf rode his bike
a bit uphill, navigated narrow streets until he reached a small
parking place.
There, just
across the street lay one of those newer houses. Just one among the
others. The building that sat on the spot where his mother lived her
first eighteen years.
Now, when he had
finally reached his goal he was suddenly unsure about what to do. It
wasn't like he could knock of the door to perfect strangers. Ulf
shook his head. He felt a little distraught, but then a solution
reached his mind. The small graveyard lay just a few minutes away,
and he could pay his respects to his grandmother, despite her never
having been his grandmother in this world.
With new-found
determination he mounted his bike again and pedalled away. Close to
the temple, hidden away behind it. Not many people visited it each
day, and he hoped to find it empty when he arrived there.
Ulf led his bike
the last bit. Arriving on foot just seemed more decent. When there
was just one corner remaining he parked it and dropped his backpack. With his hands he tried to tidy up his hair, and after that he
started walking the last few metres.
Glorious sunshine
followed him to the graves, and when he looked up he saw he wasn't
alone. His aunt, or the woman who had been his aunt in his previous
life stood there caring for his grandmother's grave.
Pity, poor
timing. I'll just wait.
Then she turned
and looked at him.
He heard her draw
for breath and saw how she dropped the flowers she held in her hand.
“Who are you?”
Huh?
“Excuse me, my name is Hamarugen Urufu,” he said in the Japanese
way.
“Who are you?
Why are you here. You look just like my older sister.”
Crap! Forgot I
got my looks from mom. “I do?” he tried.
“You could be
her son, but she only had daughters, so who are you?”
So mom married
in this world as well? That makes me happy to hear. “As I said,
I'm just a visitor.”
“Just a
visitor? You're tall like a foreigner, just like all of Akane's
daughters.”
Wait a moment,
so she married Lars in this world as well? So I have siblings
of a kind in this world. Still, being recognised for who he
couldn't be was a problem. It was time to be partially honest.
“Well, I
couldn't possibly be the son of your older sister,” Ulf said. He
was thirty five years younger here after all.
“You could be a
grandson. Her daughters haven't visited us since they married.”
Mom's
grandson? Yeah, I have a daughter older than myself now. That could
work. “I wouldn't know. It's been a while since I met my
grandmother.” A partial truth. He hadn't seen his mother for over
two years.
“I don't know
who you are, but I know you're not telling me everything. Someone
looking so much like Akane and wearing her name is someone I must
talk with.”
Yeah, she
would be Akane Hammargren in this world as well. He bowed
acceptance and followed the old woman after she had set the flowers
by the grave. It gave him an excuse to pay his respects as well.
The interrogation
that was to follow was a price he was willing to pay.
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